Surgery arrival time was 6 am. It usually takes around 45 minutes to get to Penn so I said we should leave at 5. We didn’t end up leaving until 5:15 but that wasn’t a problem. I looked at the GPS as we got onto 95. I was shocked and sure I’d typed in the wrong address. 20 minutes? I didn’t believe it until we rolled up to the valet with plenty of time to spare. 

An interesting aspect of the prep for surgery is they ask you to drink 20 oz of Gatorade 2 hours before your surgery, which makes the day so much more pleasant when you’re battling dehydration. 

Checking in was uneventful, much like the 20 minute commute. I was shocked by how quickly they got me back in a room almost naked sitting on a bed (same comment I make on so many first dates.). That quickness followed a long wait. I had given a premature goodbye to my Mom in the waiting room. She came back to wait in this room. Finally, the masked people came in and the questions started. What are you allergic to? What’s your name? When’s your birthday? I’m expecting a large haul next February. 

An anesthesiologist resident from Virginia who went to Rice wheeled me back to surgery. I mentioned that he seemed to have no accent. I asked if he ever has one. Flustered, he confirmed that he picked it back up when was back around his people. I got off of the stretcher and walked into the bright beautiful OR and onto the table. 

This was all happening in the Pavillion. It’s a really fancy brand new building where every room is brand new and pristine. Additionally, every single room is private. As I’m lying there in I ask “what do I have to do to get a patient room in this building.” And everyone laughed at me. They said urology has rooms in the other older building. Their laughs didn’t hurt too much. 

The question came “what do you want to listen to?” And my fingers were crossed as I responded by asking if it was a Spotify situation. “Yup! Anything you want.” I asked for Sufjan Stevens – Illinois and the nurse made an impressed sound as she went to put it on. I made it to the third track (Come On! Feel the Illinoise! (Part I: “The World’s Columbian Exposition” / Part II: “Carl Sandburg Visits Me in a Dream), of course) before losing my battle with the anesthesia.  I can only hope they played the whole album and the OR staff’s tears dropped into my body as they listened to aid in the healing process.  Holy Sufjan Tears. 

Next thing I know I woke up in a recovery room with a nurse named Meg. She was filling in for a nurse named Megan who came later. Megan was from Delco and had pretty eyes. Shockingly, I was both not in a narcotic haze and not in unimaginable pain. No morphine pump this time, just some nerve medicines through the IV and Tylenol. 

This time in this room was uneventful. I learned that my two bags are low on my abdomen which is good news for keeping things hidden. Additionally, the surgeon told my Mom that in spite of all the scar tissue they were able to do everything they planned. They used the original ileostomy to place the urostomy and created a new ostomy for the ileostomy. I had a terrible dry mouth in this room. I only had to press the button once, for unrelated reasons, because Megan was always there to help out. My Mom was stuck in her chair and needed help getting out. Thsts the unrelated reason  

Cameron came to deliver me to my patient room. (Single room. No need for anxiety.). This room was at least a ten minute walk, so I harangued my Mom to leave and ask Christian to drive her home. The journey for my Mom would have been different.  For Cameron and I it was through empty patient only tunnels painted all white with some decorations and several elevators. It was exciting. I compared it to Severance, but Cameron had never seen it. When I told her it was very good but a little weird. She asked if I liked Midsommar. I had never seen that, but I was confident to say no. She said that was good, but a little weird, too.

In the room I was helped by Nash and Shardae. They were both so kind and infinitely patient. Nash had an awesome Gameboy popsicle stick tattoo. 

Sleep was hard—and would continue to be, for various reasons (spoiler alert)—to obtain in this room. But, everyone was extremely kind and nice in helping the evening pass. I went through lots of ice chips and sips of water and made many curses about losing the ChapStick I’ve kept in my pockets for months. 

I did wake up to do the wordle and connections.  3/6 in Wordle. 2 errors in Connections.